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Wednesday, May 03, 2006

You Know What They Say

Hello everyone! Yeesh, I'm emailing you more than those abnoxious spammers! But I have a funny story. One that is fresh off the presses, as they say!

So we've all chuckled at my consistency to misunderstand people, especially those with accents foreign to my own. There was the salesman in Walsall whom I thought was asking about my 'accident' when really he was saying 'accent.' Then there was the very embarassing incident of the gentleman in Kidderminster who was inquiring about my profession. (I thought he asked, 'Are you a prostitute,' but he was really saying, 'Are you a pastor, too.') Well, today I found myself in another one of those classic 'it-only-happens-to-me' situations.

Today we were at one of my favourite schools in Malta. It is a Catholic school and the priest there, Brother Kieren, is a wonderful man who is extremely welcoming and encouraging to our teams. In fact, all the staff and students are. We've been going to that school all the years we've had teams in Malta and we always have a lot of fun there.

One of the best things about visiting the school is that they always cook us a big, delicious lunch. There is always a home made soup, fresh baked Maltese bread, and an amazing pasta dish. Yes, they really know how to treat us right!

After lunch, we went back to the hall to pack up our set and all our props then say goodbye to our friends at the school. Brother Kieren shook our hands and blessed us all before he had to run back to his class, leaving one of the lady teachers behind to escort us out. As the team went ahead, I walked with the teacher just to tell her how much we appreciated everything they had done for us that day.

"We love coming to your school," I gushed, "especially since you always feed us so well!"

"Well, we like that you come here and the students like it very much," she responded in her thick Maltese accent. It was clear that English wasn't her first language and she was struggling to put her sentences together. "We have a saying here in Malta, you probably know it and have it in your country, too. We say, 'If you have empty sex, the body will fall over.'"

A moment of awkward silence.

"Uh, pardon me?" I had definitely heard that wrong.

"We say this because you know, if the sex is empty the body will fall down." She then repeated it for me in Maltese, which didn't clear things up at all.

So I lied. "Oh, right. I see." What the heck was she talking about?

I waved good bye and quickly walked down the street stiffling my laughter. Had I heard her correctly? I wanted to ask her again to repeat herself. In fact, I almost said to her, "Look, that may be a popular phrase where you come from, but I've only been married 5 years and I don't know that one yet!"

As it turns out, I still have no idea what she was saying. I ran it pass the team and we are all totally clueless on this one. I'm writing this to you so that maybe some one out there can decipher this cryptic message for me.

Hopefully some one can tell me the meaning of this saying. I'm sure it's simple, like the writing's on the wall but I'm running around like a chicken with it's head cut off so I don't have time to stop to smell the roses. Maybe I got up on the wrong side of the bed and I'm not the sharpest knife in the Swiss Army today. Who can tell with all this mumbo jumbo. Maybe she was just mad as a hatter, not playing with a full deck, you know? I'm sure if I put on my thinking cap though, I can solve this idium.

God bless you all and be sure to let me know if you have any ideas about this! Thanks!

Straight from the horses mouth,
~Alycia DeLong

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